This could get me killed, but I say it in LOVE

How does the world see modern day Christian? 

 How should they see us? 

This is just my opinion.  Many Christians today are some the meanest, self-centered, selfish, small mind, penurious, malicious, nasty, envying, evil people.  Witchcraft has filled many churches, and I define witchcraft as controlling spirits.  How can you share the love of Jesus if you judging everyone.   The church building should be a hospital, a place of prayer, praise and forgiveness for our wounded. One of my pastor said, that Christian are the only people who kill their wounded, and it’s true.  Some people see going to church as being in the body of Christ, wrong!  The body of Christ or the Bride is spiritual and in the heart.  Those that confess Christ as Lord and savior and believe that the Father (GOD) raised him from the dead, shall be saved that HIS bride, Rom 10:9-10.  Jesus is LOVE; unfortunately in our society love is associated with sex, NOT!  There many words for love in the bible and each have a different purpose, but the God kind of love is called A ’gape Unconditional love.  I believe this type of love is impossible for the physical man to achieve. 

This God kind of love, has no judgment, no expectation, makes no sense to our physical mind.  Jesus died on the cross while we were still dead and in sin, and separated from the Father.  The bible tell us that we were not worthy of this type of love, but Jesus did it anyway.  Our goal as Christian show be to follow the lead of the one we say died for us, Jesus.  Love is understanding, caring, gentle while firm, unselfish, encouraging, trusting, respectful, submissive and meek. We as Christians are not perfect understand that!!!! but Jesus died on the cross to reconnect us to the Father, so we should seek right standing continually.  One day we will get a new body, and walk in the garden with the Lord and the Father just like Adam did in the beginning.  So, are we holy? YES, just not holier than thou.

My mother shared a secret with me today. Inside I knew something

Me and my Mom have gotten very close since my Dad passed in 2005.  I’ve learned more about their life together in the last 6 years then in the previous 44.  I was blessed with good parents, far from perfect! and I thank GOD that I’ve had the opportunity to forgive him of their short comings.  Today,  I think my mom sensed a little sadness in my voice,  because she inquired on  whereabouts of several close friends, MOMs' do that.  So, I shared with her a few things, and within our conversation she shared with me that I had a little brother (A family secret).

She said he died on May 4^th, 1968.  One night in a dream she believes they met.  He looked a lot like my Dad. In my mom's gentle voice she said that my grandmother and Dad are taking care of him in heaven.

Could that be why I cherish brotherly friendship so much? I had been asking God for several months the answer.  I feel complete when I have a trusted brother. 1 Samuel 20:16 there’s just something special about it too me.

On the day I go to heaven I believe I will be met by someone I’ve neverseen before, my little brother.    

Lead me not into temptation "Blueprint to prayer"

Don't you think we need more prayer today?  The Bible shows us different types of prayers; corporate prayer, personal prayers, the prayers of agreement, and prayer of thanksgivinging.  So, how do we pray?  Jesus shares in Matthew a blueprint to prayer.  In the book of Matthew 6:8-15 Jesus gives us this guideline for prayer.  It’s known in the church circles as the Lord’s Prayer.  I’m not going to write about the whole prayer but focus on one very important line, I feel is missed by many churches today.

The “Blueprint” given in Matthew 6:8-15

Matthew 6:9 Jesus tells us to pray in this manner (not to repeat him).

6:10- Acknowledge who you’re praying to for the answers; The Father

6:11-Acknowledge that the word is our promise and we feed daily on it.

6:12-Forgive, why? So we give no place to our enemy by holding unforgiveness in our heart, which could hinder our prayer request to the Father.

6:13-VERY IMPORTANT. This is where I stop today.  Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil. for YOURS is the Kingdom and the power and the glory forever amen.  God the Father should always be addressed first, because HE is our source of help.  So many churches pass right over this very important verse.  We are all tempted, so we really need GOD’s help.  I recently started praying this in my life, and I have found that the Holy Spirit (the voice within) has gain strength in those times of temptation which has help me avoid situations that I may not do all the well (laughs), like spending money I don’t have, lusting after the flesh, over eating…etc.  Dear Father lead me not into temptation, and deliver me from evil!  Try it today.  Just my thought for today. 

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Knowing your enemy and why!

Just want to share a teaching I’ve been working on for the last few weeks.  The Apostle Paul writes in Ephesian 6:12 “ For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers, power over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places”. Paul was sharing the same message as Jesus! Be aware of your enemy!! Who’s the enemy?  Who are these spiritual forces, and what does Jesus say about them?  I have a lot of military friends and the first thing they will tell you about fighting battles, is to know your enemy!  Why should you know your enemy? The bible in 2 Corinthians verse 11, says so that we would not be outwitted by Satan, for we are not ignorant of his designs. So what’s important to know about your enemy motives, Jesus warns us in John 10:10 "The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy”. This is the enemy’s main objective.

So what are some of the names of our enemy?

Satan, Lucifer, Son of the morning, Iblis, the tempter, the old serpent, Beelzebub, Meririm, god of this world, deceiver of the brothers, the thief and the father of liars.  So how can we battle off a spiritual enemys in our life?

First thing; understand it’s not the person in the physical that is causing your problems.  SO FORGIVE THEM!  Second; submit yourself to GOD and resist the enemy and he has too flee from you. -James 4:7.  Now when I say submit yourself to GOD, that’s not going to church, it means in your pray time alone talk with GOD like you would a trusting friend, and then resist evil, whether in thoughts, actions, or in speaking, and the enemy has to leave.  (Spiritual law, in action).  I always like to remember this; the enemy only has the power I give him.  According to the bible the enemy has no creative power, but will try to control your WILL, with suggestions, deception, lies.  HE DOES NOT HAVE CONTROL OVER YOU.  The battle in the spirit realm is over our WILL’s, and God will not force anyone to love or follow HIM.

Expectation

"The best things in life are those unexpected, because there is no expectation." As I look for some form of happiness in this life, I realize most of my self imposed pressures are living up to others expectations of me. My dad was never the father I expected, which left us battling all the time, but when I dropped any expectation and forgave him for the past, my father and I enjoyed a loving relationship before he went home. Today, I see people placing so much pressure on themselves because of what television and marketers say, what we should expect or have in life. Last night in my prayer time, the heart of my Grandmother came to me. She enjoyed life because she had very little expectation of others and gave no value to material things. I want have that heart, and by God's mercy I will. " Expectation; the act or state of looking forward or anticipating; expectant is a mental attitude." My new goal is to only expect the things God said and promised, and let people be who they are, and to not pressure myself to be what others think. I try to be a good person but I'm not perfect, just forgiven. I'm required only by my Father to show, mercy, forgiveness, and good well.

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The friendship rule

Sometimes reconnecting with old friends is tricky. You can instantly remember why you distance yourself or you can't figure out why the separation ever happen. Many people say that some friends are just for a season, but I don't get that, and I really wish I could. If I call you friend that means I feel something special about you and will fight to keep you around. the only way I would let go is if you don't want me. If I call you brother, that means I have a deep respect and appreciation for you and plan on you being around forever. If I make a covenant with you, that's a bond into the after life and your enemies are my enemies. (Blood to Blood). To me,acquaintances come and go because they only serve a temporary purpose.

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Happy Birthday, Kenny JUNE 11, 1965 to 1988

While looking for something to watch tonight.  I came across a movie called "Less than Zero".  It's about the San Fernando Valley in the 80's and the bond between friends.  I can remember the night this movie came out as if it was yesterday.  I was with Kenny, and his Mom sitting on the floor of her Sherman Oaks, CA.  Condo.  The room was very quiet while the movie was playing, and very little was said after that.  The movie was true to life, I just didn't know at the time that my best friend would have the same fate as the troubled main character.  The party scenes in the this movie were 100% accurate for the Valley in the 80's. I wonder how many young life were lost to drugs. 

Me and Kenny were like night and day,  I was an bi racial "Oreo" kid who loved Fleetwood and Donna Summers, Kenny was red headed soul brother, who loved his ROCK and ROLL, R&B, and the Motown sound.  I was more white then him, and he was more black then me.  I went to church on Sundays, and Kenny stay in bed to recover from Saturday.  Me and Kenny talked about everything, life's fears, and very deep personal stuff, we even fought like brother (everyday), but one of the most important things to me was Kenny was himself with me.  I watched him around his buddies, his father and how he acted with his mom.  We just knew each other well, and that seem to make life okay.  I have some every  good people in my life, people who seem to care about my well being, and some how I feel Kenny is in Heaven making sure I'm okay until he meet me at the end of my tunnel.  Love you Brother, and miss you much.

The heart of GOD.

Today, I called a very special person in my life.  The bible says in Psalms 27:10 "Even though your father and mother have left you, GOD will care for you.  11: Teach me your ways Father ( Adonai) lead me on a level path."  My grandmother told me to read this scripture and God would always provide for me.  So when my father was out doing ungodly things, the Lord will always provided me with someone to help in his place.  A lot of my very close relationships were with older people, and now as their getting tired and going home to get rest, its hard to say farewell until I come there too.  Today "Pop" McClendon sounded so tired, "Mom" McClendon went home over ten years ago, I think he really misses her.  The advantage as a young man in having so many older wiser people in your life to fall back on is so wonderful, but now my heart which is still in recovery is breaking today.  I love you Papi, but your will be done. You are a gem in my life and I thank GOD for you.

ME and GOD

God's ways, doesn't always make sense to me, but I'm not God.

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What does GOD mean when HE says I'm cleaning house

Don't ask the Father to clean your house unless you mean it  Last year I had 1683 sq ft of things clothes, furniture, cars, and pictures on my walls, than six months ago it was reduced to a 10x10x10 storage bend .  One month ago I moved to Hawaii with only two bags and a backpack, so that was all that remained..  This morning I began to reduce that down to one bag, and a backpack.  Now that's house cleaning!!! but Father you can stop now!!!

What do I say?

I enjoy writing my thoughts, it's helping me to release things inside. My love ones are asking me "How are you doing" and I dont know what to say? I'm tired of expressing or sharing the negative, but thing are negative right now. I dont want to lie, because Ive seen lately what lying does to relationships. I love and trust my love ones, and need them more than ever now. I feel the angels watching over me more then ever, and I have gotten so close to the Holy Spirit. So, here's what happening to me. The Father is answering my prayers. He making a new me, not that the old one was bad, but HE making me better, and my love ones will be proud. He also showing me my love ones! So I guess I will just say " Im being blessed during this test".

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It just hit me!! WOW

The tides are finally starting to change.  I've been thinking a lot about my life and the choices I've made  I don't want to repeat the mistakes of the past.  I've always had this weird need to say I have a best friend, but no one seem to want the job...hahaha.  I guess the desire comes from my lonely childhood.  A person that would love you unconditionally, have your best interested at heart, someone who takes up your cause, but includes you in their life.  A lot of people would say that this may be your wife, but I don't feel that way.  I Think when you get married, she become a part of you and versa it totally a different relationship in my head.  I do hope that someday I meet her too.  In the valley of life that I'm temporary in, you can see clearly so many things.  One night last week I was laying on the beach in Waikiki, with a tropical breeze and a local hotel's band playing Hawaiian music in the background, and as I was talking to Jesus, when it hit me like a bolt of lightening.  I've had a best friend all my life! then it flashed again before my eyes.....yes I've had the same best friend since the age of 4.   WOW, I began to cry, all these emotions began to flow in me.  Jesus said he would go to the Father and ask him to send us a comforter, a best friend, a friend that would stick closer than a brother, this very person helping me now.  I can't began to tell you what the Father is doing in my life, but you will see one day soon, and as I lay here in a hostel, between a crack house and meth house thinking about just one year ago I had a three bedroom house, I hear my friend Jackie, say keep looking forward, and while fear pokes its head in ever once in a while my little brother Brent will always call to check on me, but last week when my Mom toldbme I was her best friend, that give me the courage to fight on, so I can make them proud of me again.  I am so truly blessed by love! Something good is coming my friends!

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Naive or just plan Stupid!

Am I naive or just stupid? With all the poor decision I've made in the last four years. I realized today that it’s mainly because of me being naive! Jesus said to put my trust in him, for the most part I did, but I also put too much trust in men. So where has it all gotten me? Going through hell in paradise...hahaha. The funniest thing is while I’m in this valley, (that's what I call it); I see so many beautiful things. Like my true friends, like a father on a bus protecting his daughter as she lays her head on his lap. I even remember in my darkest hour in Austin Texas I had the opportunity to interview a sweet homeless couple at starbuck. I fine it funny how they ended up ministering to me, the word of God. Right now I am very unhappy, but content, stupid or Naïve? The Father is doing something in my life, because I've asked him too. Now I must listen to the advice I gave my little brother a few weeks ago, to just sit back and listen! And as the Holy Spirit speaks to me I will remain naive.
Speaking of Austin Texas. It wasn’t all bad, I had a beautiful home for a while, I loved my radio show, and for a while was really happy, but I can tell you I was so so so naïve, but the cool thing is I don’t regret the good things that were done.

A lesson well learned!

This weekend I learned a big big lesson. The young man I wrote about last week is beginning his journey thru the USA. He seem very concern about being in LA for 2 days alone before he picked up a tour going around California.  I called on a girl in LA,  a new friend from Chile. I met her in Hawaii a few months earlier, she was meeting her cousin from Chile to travel the islands of Hawaii, she was friendly caring and very beautiful. So I called her in LA to see if she could take care of my new friend on Saturday so he would not be alone. She was excited and just when I thought how good things were going until I got this bad vibe around 7pm Saturday night, so I called my friends hotel several times until midnight in Cali, no answer. I called the security to check his room, no one was inside. I called her phone several times phone but it was turned off. Another Swedish guy in my room called my friends phone, he answered. When I told him who was calling, he just said " I'm so high" my heart stopped, and my head filled with all these bad thoughts, but there was more, he didn't know were he was, just that it was a boat. I became so angry I started to shake, As my friend began to ask where he was, I could hear in the background, Marina del ray and too hang up the phone,  so I had my young friend put Nicole on the phone.  I came un-glued, telling her she had 45mins to get him to his hotel or I would call the authorities. What's wrong with people? even she sounded drugged out of mind.After calling a cop friend of mine in LA, he told me my young would also be arrested if I called the cops, so I just prayed he arrived back to his hotel, which he did. The lesson  me is not interfere with people's chosen life journey. . Footnote; My childhood best friend died in a drug related situation in the same city my angel unaware was staying.  I couldn't sleep all night.  God is good, and I pray my young friend is safe, and back on his chosen journey.

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Eyes wide open

I met this very nice lady on the bus today. She was homeless and going to a job interview. As I sat watching her put on her make up on, it hit me. It was so important for her to look her best, no matter how tough her life, or situation. I watched her changed from a tired looking, down in the dumps person, into a fifth avenue business women, in a 45min bus ride. Hope and pray she gets the Job.

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An Angels unaware

Have you ever entertained an Angel? It's that someome that comes into your life for a short period, but has a profounding affect. A few days ago the Lord sent an Angel into my life to help me avoid getting depressed. David from Sweden is traveling around the world. He arrived a few days ago from Bali. He has help me to laugh and smile again. Im meeting people from all over the world , with the most interesting stories. I pray the Lord to send me more angels, because they care. Have a safe trip to LA, MIA, and NYC before going home my Friend, David. Be safe .Hebrews 13.2

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Life is a battle

Life is a battle.

I fine it fitting to be sitting here at The Pearl Harbor memorial writing this part of my blog. A friend told me last year that I was under a spiritual attack, and yes it was a surprise, that nearly took me out, just like the first and surprise attack on December 7th 1941 Pearl. Then the second wave hit, I was a little bit more prepare, but it seem to cripple me none the less so, as I stand here today, trusting the Lord daily for everything, even a place to live, just like the US pacific fleet I too shall rise again, rebuilt and stronger than ever.

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The First Day

Just arrived into Honolulu where my new life should begin. I had a fear that loneliness would take hold of me once I arrived, and it did. I said a prayer my grandmother showed me in the bible. Psalm 27. Now as I write the loneliness has disappeared. I realized yesterday that I lost all my material goods and will have to seek the Father daily for HIS help. I truly dont think HE planned it this way, I just took too many wrong turns. Keep me in your prayers as I continue to pray for you. (Day One)

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Rejection healed by compassion.

Rejection can be defined as the sense of being unwanted, the wounds are closely related to betrayal and shame. Sometimes rejection is so wounding and painful, it crushes the spirit. Prv 18:14. This has happened to me. The Holy Spirit showed me during prayer that in my situation the events were not about me, but the pain is still great. So what do we do? That's when I was given the example of Jesus (Matt 9:36). Jesus had compassion on the very people who killed him. Satan knew all the Son of God had to do was open his mouth, and his enemies would of been destroyed! Compassion. I pray today that the Lord, will continue to show me how to forgive His way.

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Surprised by PRIDE

Pride :
Feeling of superiority: a haughty attitude shown by somebody who believes, often unjustifiably, that he or she is better than others

We tend to think of pride as being arrogant or self centered, but the spirit of pride takes the role of self pity too.

During my personal prayer time I would always confess to the Lord how I believed I never operated in pride because I was always willing to forgive people and admit my errors quickly. One day the Holy Spirit showed me that I was operating in pride, because of self pity. Think about it with self pity your thoughts are always about us! Sounds like pride to me. It may not be an arrogant type of pride but its still pride.

I had to repent of that spirit of self pity, because it’s one of those little foxes that could block your prayer life.

Lead me not into temptation

The Godhead never tempts us, but yet we are tempted. So who does the tempting? Satan! If he tempted Jesus, he will tempt us. How did Jesus overcome satans temptations? He Jesus quoted the WORD! Jesus quoted the WORD, and satan fleed. We need to read the WORD, and pray that we are not lead into temptation.

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How did HE know?

I don't mean to sound religious, but I am a Christan, which I will never deny.  Yesterday I was driving by a church in my local town.  This church was in the middle of the desert.  I had been wanting someone to pray over me because I felt a negative spiritual attack was happening to me.  It just so happen that this church was having a special Saturday night service.  After hearing the message which was a special book in the bible for me, the pastor giving the message asked if anyone needed prayer so I went forward. The pastor just laid hands on me and prayed about this attack that was against me... how did he know?  The Holy Spirit is everywhere and knows all things.  I pray the blood Jesus all the time, but sometimes like the bible says, we need others to help us.  Today is a much better day.

Consider the source! always

I was recently told that some bad things were said about me to a good friend, and you know, I felt something was said because my friend changed.  So you probably thinking what do I call this person a friend?  I'm a person that picks my friends by my heart, and its never let me down.  I've learned how to forgive people and try to love unconditionally, even if it hurts sometimes.  Once at a very young age while reading my bible, the Holy Spirit showed me that people talked badly about Jesus all the time, so what did HE do? he turned the other cheek.  In the spirit of meekness and humility Jesus was so confident in him self that the words of other never took him off track.  I truly believe Jesus always considered the source "Satan most of the time" take a look at the gospel of Mark, you will see religious people and actual demons make negative comments to and about Jesus.  Jesus himself even said, if they talked about me they will talk about you, because we are not greater then our Lord.  I love my friend greatly, and maybe one day he will "consider the source" and not care about what people say. 

Thought for the day: Consider the source!!! If you're a person of integrity, talk with your trusted friend, don’t always believe the messenger.
1Cor 13

The day of Reckoning is coming

The prodigal son will always have a day of reckoning, it could be while in the whorehouse, in the jailhouse or even while in the penthouse, but it will come!!  Jesus says, just ask for forgiviness, and your it's done!  So why do we wait?

Integrity

1.   When you do the right thing even though no one is watching.

2.    Your integrity is worth it's weight in gold.

Forgiveness, a spiritual law, not a christian rule!

The fundamental truth about forgiveness is acknowledgement, repentance, and reconciliation.

Genesis 50:15-21, tells the story of true forgiveness.

1John 1:9-10 tell us that we are to confess our sins, and that the Father will forgive us. 

If the Father is willing to forgive us, how do we not forgive our earthly brothers.

Mark 11:25-26 give us a blue print to forgiveness.  Acknowledge, the sin or deed. Repent, which means don't repeat.  Reconcile, reunited again.